A family holiday tradition

The holiday season has arrived sooner than I expected. Christmas is just around the corner.

Where ever I look, the ads, the signs and the displays, everything reminds me, it’s time to buy and buy more.

I like holidays and special days, whether they are Christmas or New Year, Valentine’s Day or Mother’s Day, but I don’t like the over commercialization of these special days. I am not a person who likes to go shopping. Besides I think most of us already have more than we need. My kids get enough toys and stuff that I don’t feel like to buy more for them. Do I need to buy more just because everyone else is doing so?

My love language is definitely not gifts, but words.

My son was born in 1998. For his first Christmas eight years ago, I wrote the following to him:

Dear Andy:

You very first Christmas is just around the corner. In the holiday spirit of sharing and giving, gifts are shared and given. But instead giving you toys and clothes which you will outgrow in a blink of eyes and certainly will not remember anything at all, Mom is writing you this letter as your first holiday gift.

Mom hopes this letter as well as the ones to follow will become your treasured possession in the years to come. I promise you that every year until you are 18 years old I’ll write at least one letter documenting important events that happen to you during that year.

Another promise I want to make here is to contribute $500.00 or whatever the maximum amount allowed every year from your birth until you are 18 years old to your College Savings Account. The money will be used for your education in the future. It’s a long term investment.

Mom hopes you will become a well educated person who values education and life long learning.

When my daughter Amy came to the world one year later, I promised her the same things.

Two years ago, I did a Christmas treasure hunt for my kids. I hid little presents in different rooms for them to find. They loved it so much, they asked me to do it again last year, which I did.

For each of my two kids, I wrote 10 reasons why I love them on 10 cards in 10 different colors. On the other side of the cards I wrote the clue to find the next treasure. I used 10 different kinds of treats to go along with the cards. The number of treats corresponded to the number of reasons on the card.

So the card with reason number 1 was accompanied by 1 treat, the card with reason number 2 was accompanied by 2 treats, etc. The treats were edible things, like candies, chocolate and cookies, or money or books.

I spent many hours cutting the papers, writing two sets of cards with different love notes and clues so both kids could do the treasure hunt at the same time, but not together, finding treats, figuring out where to hide the treasures according to the clues so each of them could find only the treasures intended for them individually. I didn’t sleep much the night before Christmas Eve.

Andy and Amy had so much fun. And I took a lot of pictures.

Two months ago, Andy and Amy asked me, “Mommy, can we do the Christmas treasure hunt again this year?” I said “Sure.”

I haven’t figured out what to do yet. Just this year, I have done treasure hunt for them on birthday, on Easter and on Halloween. I have run out of ideas. I am afraid I wouldn’t be as creative as last Christmas.

Doing a treasure hunt is not as easy as buying a gift, wrapping it and putting it under the tree. But I would rather spend more time and efforts than spending more money. I know my kids probably will not remember what presents they get, but I am sure they will remember the fun they had on their treasure hunting.

I will try my best to keep the promises I made in my first letter to them and make the treasure hunt our holiday tradition.

Doing things with my children instead of buying excessive or expensive gifts for them is more important and meaningful to me. Letters and wonderful memories are much more precious to me than anything else.

[Originally published in Woodbury Bulletin on 12/13/2006]